WTF code

“ Always code as if the guy who ends up maintaining your code will be a violent psychopath who knows where you live. Martin Golding

“ Programming is like sex: one mistake and you’re providing support for a lifetime. Michael Sinz

“ The trouble with programmers is that you can never tell what a programmer is doing until it’s too late. Seymour Cray

“ Most software today is very much like an Egyptian pyramid with millions of bricks piled on top of each other, with no structural integrity, but just done by brute force and thousands of slaves. Alan Kay

Kenny's Ass

A city boy, Kenny, moved to the country and bought a donkey from an old farmer for $100.

The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day. The next day the farmer drove up and said, "Sorry son, but I have some bad news, the donkey died last night ."

Kenny replied: "Well then, just give me my money back."

The farmer said,"Can't do that. I went and spent it already."

Kenny said,"OK then, just unload the donkey."

The farmer asked, "What ya goanna do with him?"

"I'm going to raffle him off." (Note: To raffle is to sell a thing by lottery - draw lot to a group of people each paying the same amount for a ticket)

"You can't raffle off a dead donkey!"

"Sure ! I can", Kenny said. "Watch me. I just won't tell anybody he's dead."

A month later the farmer met up with Kenny and asked, "What happened with that dead donkey?"

"I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at two dollars apiece and made a profit of $898."

The farmer asked "Didn't anyone complain?"

"Just the guy who won," Kenny answered. "So I gave him back his two dollars."

Kenny grew up and eventually became the chairman of Enron. (Kenneth Lay)